——沈老师英文写作系列二
（以Imagination主题写作为例）
书面表达：根据下面文字及图片，按照要求写一篇150词左右的文章。
审题：
1. 仔细阅读材料内容，迅速抓住材料的关键内容（建议勾划出各个段落的关键词）。
Paragraph One:
imagination, mankind, civilization, invent, dreamed of, realities
Paragraph Two:
a great role and value, daydreaming, daily affairs…
Paragraph Three:
Parents, too much free time, waste opportunities for learning, not a gift to children
2. 阅读写作材料和要求，快速构思。
正确的和审题构思需要快速准确地梳理，不难看出，本次写作主题写作所提供的材料分三段。
想象力推动人类文明进步，让人类的无数梦想变成现实。（这是高大上的层面）
想象力对于普通人日常生活的意义——让我们的生活更方便、多彩。（这是老百姓的日常层面）
一些父母认为想象是浪费孩子宝贵的学习时间。（这是现实层面，同时也是矛盾冲突的焦点——即对于一件事/问题/现象的两种不同的看法或认识。认识到这一点，就会有利于打开分析问题和解决问题的思路，也就是，造成问题的原因是什么？该如何解决或找出对策？）
3. 脑洞大开，思如泉涌。
每一段都有每一段的任务（一般文章分三、四段，多数按三段立意即可）。
第一段：概述材料内容——开门见山，突出主题，切忌七弯八转。
结合第2点的分析，快速连词成句，连句成段。巧妙运用第1点勾画出来的关键词即可成句。
Example 1: Imagination, which has contributed a lot to mankind’s development and civilization, is also of great importance in everyone’s daily life. However, parents today tend to prepare children for their future, thus harming children’s ability of imagination.（36 words,小曹同学习作）
点评：要点齐全，词汇高级，书写漂亮。句式结构紧凑合理，定语从句、分词、衔接词运用自如。
Example 2: In our daily life, we all use imagination, which has led mankind to its current brilliant civilization. However, some parents prepare their children’s future, not knowing the value of imagination.(30 words, 小聂同学习作)
点评：
优点：要点基本齐全，字迹工整，会用从句、分词、衔接。
缺点：未能将文本过滤加工，有原文痕迹，所以在第2小点上有失偏颇。
Example 3: Imagination, which we use in almost everything, not only helps people fulfill their dreams but also makes great contributions to the development of civilization. But unfortunately, parents today often sacrifice children’s free time and force them to follow their wills, causing great damage to children’s imagination. (46 words, 钱同学习作)
点评：2个字，高级。但字数超过，这是有柴的人的通病。解决办法是写作的时候忘掉原材料。
Example 4: Imagination plays an important role not only in one’s personal life, but also in social development. However, nowadays many parents are taking away children’s imagination by their so-called “best intentions”.（30 words,小江同学习作）
点评：要点基本齐全，有衔接语，但第二点概括得模糊，不具体。
第二段：续写想象力的重要性。
本段主题句应该表明态度，想象力是重要的，因为……首句为统领，应言简意赅。一个主句加一个从句或分词即可。
分论应为：想象力如何重要？对谁重要？在哪些方面重要？
Example 1: The world needs imagination because it inspires creativity and helps change the world for the better, otherwise, we wouldn’t enjoy the convenience of modern life. Meanwhile, if we keep imagination off, life would be much more boring as there is no fun left, only with bare facts. Moreover, imagination in children encourages them to explore the outside world, thus achieving greater successes than their parents and grandparents. (67 words, 小朱同学习作)
点评：正反论证运用恰当，能灵活运用虚拟语气。说理基本清楚，但未能有效展开，所以字数不足。
Example 2: Imagination works as a bridge between creative thinking and reality. The inventions of light and smart phones went down in history with the help of imagination. Stories, movies, music are all products of people’s imagination. Imagination is a big part of our life. In other words, we can’t even live without it. What’s more, scientists believe that imagination is the future of communication with no phones needed in the centuries to come. （72 words,小肖同学习作）
点评：有主题有正反论证，语言流畅，凸显功力。缺点：最后一句语焉不详。
Example 3: There is no denying that everything originates from imagination, which plays a critical role in the development off the world that we live in. It imagination that brings inspiration to scientists and makes them well-known around the world for their creativity. Were it not for imagination, we couldn’t have such a brilliant civilization where everyone enjoys the benefit of technology. So it is necessary to attach importance to develop imagination, especially for children.（小郭同学习作）
点评：说理清楚，结构高级，用词熟练老道，功力深厚。合理运用了句型、虚拟语气。
Example 4: Imagination is one of the best gifts given by God. Whoever wants to live a comfortable life can not achieve without it, let alone its importance for creating new technical inventions. Imagination helps us dig out the endless possibilities of our limited life. The stage extends as far as your imagination goes. What’s more, what you imagine reveals your desperate desire, which will show you the right direction. In face of adversities, a man with imagination is more likely to stay optimistic, which makes you much closer to success. (89 words,小季同学习作)
点评：语言优美，富有诗意。却也思路开阔，讲在点子上富有道理。一个字：quite to the point and beautiful.
第三段：如何培养孩子的想象力。
Example 1: For parents, it is of vital importance to give children free time, which allows them to develop the habit of thinking by themselves. On top of it, giving children the opportunity of creating things, like drawing or making up a story can be an effective way to cultivate their imagination. In all, imagination is so meaningful that we can’t live without it. Never can we underestimate its power to our society and human development.（74 words, 小庄同学习作）
点评：自成体系，有观点，有论述。点子合理，贴近生活。
Example 2: Children are the future of the world, so it’s of vital importance to develop their imagination. We should give them opportunity and time to imagine. Parents need to be patient and listen to their children carefully when they ask questions. Also, adults should keep in mind that imagining is not a waste of time and it’s necessary/ advisable to give their children praise and encouragement when they show their imagination. （69 words, 小陶同学习作）
点评：结构合理，建议具体合适，有主题句，有分论。
4. Roger’s version
Imagination has been playing an important role both in promoting mankind’s civilization & social development and in improving our daily life or making everything more convenient. However, some parents don’t think highly of/ value developing children’s imagination just because they think it is a waste of time for studying. （48 words）
Personally, I don’t agree with those parents. Undoubtedly, imagination is an important quality which helps people do and think creatively and critically. There is much evidence that throughout history, many significant advances have been made owing to people’s incredible (crazy) ideas and imagination, which were not recognized and even strongly opposed by their contemporaries（同时代的人）. In this sense, imaginative ability has been pushing the human society forward. As for our common people, it is creativity and imagination that produce so many wonderful ideas and inventions, with whose help we are able to look at any situation from different angles, and to mentally explore the past and the future as well. Every small step makes for a giant leap for all mankind.（126 words）
As a matter of fact, nurturing/cultivating/developing students’ imagination is especially important/ significant/ critical for their growth. For one thing, parents and teachers should give children enough time and space and encourage them to think independently and solve problems they encounter alone, which is a must-have /necessary condition for the inspiration of imagination. For another, it is advisable that students try to put what they think of and imagine into real practice. By practicing imagination, we can not only broaden our mind and perspectives but also sharpen various skills needed in academic learning. Last but not the least, a certain degree of daydreaming provides temporary happiness, calmness and relief from stress, which is beneficial especially to us Senior 3 students. （119 words）
